One Month Old

It seems really crazy to me that we've had these two sweet boys in our lives for a month now. At times it seems like it's been the longest month and other times I can't believe how fast it's gone by. I would have to say though, that it's been one of the hardest months of my life. But I am grateful for every moment we've had with them.

This month...

• We've made the drive to the hospital everyday to see them. We're so glad they're at Primary's, but we wish we lived closer than we do.
• Our medical vocabulary has increased exponentially. We've been thrown into the world of the NICU and had to become experts in preemies and neonates. 
• We've met some amazingly wonderful nurses, doctors and other medical professional. I am so grateful for modern technology and for the skills and education these professionals have. They have helped our boys so much. 
• I've probably said this before, but it's been hard to feel like their mom this past month. I feel so helpless at times. I've only held my Ethan once for a short time. There are even some days where they are too sensitive for me to even touch them and this is hard. I must continue to be patient and hope that I can start holding both of them soon.

As I was talking with the nurses last night here's their one month stats:

Andrew

Weight: 3 lbs 0 oz.

Height: 14.5 inches

Feeds: 7 ml every 3 hours

This week Andrew has been much more responsive, He likes to sleep and has a sweet smile on his face when his eyes are closed. When he is awake, he is very responsive to our voices and will look right at you. If he does nod off he'll open one eye just to make sure you're still there. He also likes to be snuggled up tight.
Andrew is fighting so hard with all of his infections. He's knocked almost all of them so far. He still has the pneumonia and the aspergillus. Although both are looking much better, again we have to be more patient and wait things out. His head has grown quite a bit the last week and a half and the neurosurgeon came and looked at him today. He looks like he's now a candidate for surgery as long as the MRI they took today comes back good (they're looking to make sure that they aspergillus has not spred into his brain.) If so, he'll have the same surgery Ethan did last week to put in a reservoir to help drain some fluid and relieve some pressure with the hydrocephalus. I pray that this nasty infection hasn't gotten to his brain and that he can quickly receive the surgery he needs.

Ethan

Weight: 2 lbs 12 oz.

Height: 14 inches

Feeds: 14 ml every 3 hours

This week he has been pretty feisty! He pulled out his breathing tube...again for the second time. (He likes to show you he's in charge)  If I had to pick which one was more active before they were born I would have picked Ethan....and he's sure living up to that. He'll kick and wiggle so much when he's getting his diaper changed and he doesn't like to be tucked in. He makes the nurses work extra hard when they're assigned to him.
Ethan is almost up to full feeds (for his weight) we are so excited about this! They are still keeping him on an minimal IV, just in case they need it for something other than nutrition.  But he's mostly getting all of his nutrition through my milk. They've been tapping his reservoir to drain the fluid of his brain once a day, but decided to change it to an every other day schedule for now because they think that doing it daily is too much pressure change for his little brain. This is a good thing, meaning that his body is trying to take care of it on it's own and they don't need to intervene so much. They'll check his brain ultrasound at the end of the week to double check.

Other than these few minor things...we've really had some pretty good stable days the past week. We are so grateful for each day that there is no bad news, because both Stephen and I feel like we've had our fair share. In the end I must say that these two have taught us so much about being parents this last month...we didn't think that we'd have to make so many difficult decisions. We hope we don't have to ever make those decisions again.